It is good to remember where God has taken us and how He is so near in the storm. Being such a visual person I love the story of "The 10 Commandments" especially the part where God goes before His people in a cloud of fire at night and in the day a just a huge awesome powerful pillar of clouds! Man, I wish I was there to photograph that! I would be the one lacking eye brows and eye lashes with the scorched face and hands from trying to touch and feel it both day and night and would probably be a real minis to Moses... "Tamara, mercy child! I said step back already for the 100Th time, Oh Lord please what do I do with this one!?!"
Well, I have had my own pillar of fires at night and pillars during the days too! While trying to get work on multiple letters for Abby I have had to research her past and was just in awe as I read some of the reports that I was given but never read back then. I think I was on overload and didn't want to read anymore bad news, but now a healthy 3 years later I am in awe of all that the Lord asked of us yet most important carried us through. I decided to re-cap on her medical issues so you too could maybe remember how the Lord used you, in prayer, service to our family, encouragement, a shoulder to cry on and so on... Because as the body of Christ He used you, you all were a big part in the pillar of fire at nights and the pillar of clouds during the days!
MARCH 2005 ~ Diagnosed at birth with multiple congenital anomalies (ear defect, mid palatal cleft, bi-cuspid aortic valve, dysplastic heart valves and right optic nerve coloboma). Duplex left kidney, dysmorphic features, PDA, hypotonia, Retrognathia, abnormal ABR, respiratory insufficiencies, failure to thrive and persistent hypoglycemia. Within a few weeks she experienced a variety of medical concerns which led to 21 extensive stay at Littleton Hospital in the NICU. APRIL 2005 ~ She under went surgery for the placement of a G-tube and Nissen fundoplication (wrapping stomach around the esophagus so she would not apserate). She continued to have medical crises over the next month which included: difficulty regulating her blood sugar levels, pneumatosis, necrotizing enter colitis and dumping syndrome. May 2005 ~ After being rushed to Sky Ridge due to the dumping syndrome she was then rushed to St. Lukes PSL where in the NICU she had a massive seizure. An MRI revealed that she had also experienced a bilateral CVA (stroke) with a greater effect to the left side of her body. September 2005 ~ Diagnosed with West Syndrome, an infantile seizure disorder which results in epilepsy by age of 2. December 2006 ~ Flew to NYCU for a EEG/qualify candidate for administration of Sabril. Last seizure todate 12/07/06. April 2006 ~ Repaired midpalatal cleft which led to a 3 week stay in the PICU due to major breathing complications. January 2008 ~ Diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy, moderate Hip disphalisa, found legally blind in right eye.
Each item for me brings back memories and emotions of sheer pain and joy... I remember where I was at spiritually and how I felt God so close, yet many, many, many times I was weak... so very weak, feeble and doubting.. you name it I was there! I tried to imitate Job, but he was something special a man of strength, incredible he was. It is o.k. to fall, we are human, battling our flesh everyday, but we must sojourn on, rise up and keep our eyes on Him (the end goal). David in the Psalms often fell, but He soon would come back around to Christ again, he was my encouragement when I fell... I remind myself of David a man after Gods own heart... he fell, but was quick to look upon His savior, His God, His friend, His father his strength. So all this to say, Thank you, to all of you that are reading this, thank you from the bottom of my heart for being there for me and my family. You were and are the embers that burn bright in our nights and the days! Tam