May 8, 2008


I have a prayer request. Abigail for the past 2 weeks has been jolting every once in a while. These jolts would last for 1-5 seconds, nothing to bad. As most know, Dr. Devinskie did up her Sabril dose back to what it was and I was hoping that this would "fix" them, not the case. I have only witnessed about 7 of them and Matt said he saw her do this once last week. I am hoping that after the Sabril dose is built back up in her system they will go away... Yesterday we were practicing her sitting and she jolted really hard, turned her head right and tightened up. My heart stopped and I just stared at her. It only lasted a few seconds, but still heart stopping non the less! She smiled and went right back to being herself... I picked her up and just held her and started to cry repeating over and over that I loved her so much, my little lambkin! I got so scared and wondered if God is preparing me for a new storm and if I was soon going to be back on the roller coaster of emotional pain. I could not let her go fearing she might jolt again. I wanted to squeeze her so hard not wanting anything else to happen. My love for her was overwhelming right then! Awhile later I was sharing with Matt that the love God has for us, His children, is so much more than in that small intense moment that I had with Abby. I thought of God wanting to pick me up, put His arms around me, squeeze so hard and tell me over and over that He loves me so much! This brings a lump to my throat... How often I get caught up in my kids and life and forget that God loves me so much, so much more that I can ever imagine... Overwhelming, the Alpha and Omega, creator of this universe and all that it encompasses LOVES ME! He is so intimately acquainted with all my ways and sees me in perfection through the veil of His son Jesus Christ! I pray that the seizures will not return and ask that you too petition at the Lords feet for this same request with me. Thank you for listing and for praying!

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